Hey Lovelies! This week we're here with a fun anecdote that is far too relatable, and definitely gives us a glimpse of what it's like to not be part of the girlfriend collective (hint: it's a blessing and a curse).
A day in a modern Asian girl's single life
I've been experiencing lots of weird and interesting interactions with potential lovers, and find myself asking "Why?" "What's wrong with me?" "Am I the only one that's not finding love?" "Are other women just as awkward as I am?"
Whatever it is, we hope that you can relate and otherwise at least have a good laugh.
Here is a list of the most awkward friggin things that can happen when you're trying to impress during that hunt for boyfriend material
Awkward Fckt**d Act #1: Kiss ‘em So They Can Shut It
Have you ever been on a date, and they just wouldn't STFU, and you could honestly care less about what they are saying? Well, a good solution is "To take charge of the situation". But your definition of "take charge" is to kiss them just so the yapping stops. Of course, after you kiss them, your hunch is confirmed: there is zero chemistry.
It's honestly better than listening to them blabber on so you just champ it out.
Awkward Fckt**d #2: The Ol’ Kiss and Run
In a crowded loud setting, you feel you’re getting good vibes and exchange contact details. Then you decide that spontaneously kissing them on the lips and running away is the sleekest move you can make. Unfortunately, they don’t reciprocate nor think it was attractive and you never hear from them again…
He asks if you workout and you really want them to be impressed by your strength. Instead of a thumb war or arm wrestle and then daintily giving in (age-old classic move), you single handedly lift their whole body over your shoulder and spin in the most butch way.
Awkward Fckt**d Act #4: You Already Have a What?
The THURST is REAL and you feel like you're vibing. They ask if you want to go for a smoke with them. During the riveting conversation they slip in that they already have a partner. What did I just waste my cigarette for?!
They ask when you are free for a date and you’re excited that there will be potential sparks but when you respond.
You never hear from them again.
THEN you proceed to drunk message them in a fit of rage and tell them what you really think, AND it’s still cricket’s chirping.
You really might as well be messaging with yourself. Cool beans. Tonight we will probably be sleeping in our own single bed again..
They asked if they could buy you a drink and you refuse (because you're an independent woman, right?). So you offer them a drink instead, and when he insists on paying again, you just yell back “I DON’T WANT TO OWE YOU ANYTHING!!!!".
ANNND that was the end of that. "Excuse, where can I file my next girlfriend application?"
He says “You’re not as girly as I thought” and you reply as the cool chick you are with “Yeah bro, I’m like a dude".
Then his peeper retracts and safe to say, any boyfriend material that was in the making together with any sexual attraction that was left, just left the building. You awkwardly stand there in silence until death takes over.
When you look at some girls you might have thoughts like "How can I be cool, cute, and sexy like her?". But we can guarantee you, all girls are #JustLikeYou and have the same type of insecurities and ponderings.
Just know that you are not the only one that makes embarrassing poor life choices when peacocking for attention. Just do you and find that inner confidence. Do things that make you happy and do not fret too much over the haves or have nots. The rest will follow.