We've all been there or will get there: too busy work schedules, friends, family, obligations, (work) stress. These are all factors that can set our libido back. As four girlfriends, we've discussed this topic many times - Eden as a newlywed wifey making sure she's on top of her intimate game, Winxi in her long-distance adventure, and Simona going into her 13th year with her lover (our fourth team member, Diana, is not mentioned. If you are subscribed to our newsletter you understand why. If you aren't subscribed - you definitely should.)
First of all - ask yourself the question, "Why do I want to increase my sex drive?". If this is for you - we applaud you. If you are doing this to impress or please someone else - then it's advised to take a step back first and break down for yourself if you're 100% behind this.
If this is for your pleasure, continue reading.
So why is your sex drive low?
We have been asked, "Why is my sex drive low?". It's a question that touches on various health and physical and mental wellness aspects. Low libido is influenced by factors ranging from hormonal changes, stress levels, and mental health challenges (depression, anxiety) to lifestyle choices such as diet and exercise.
The hormonal fluctuations we as women experience
- Estrogen and progesterone are female sex hormones that can influence your libido, especially during your menstrual cycle. Have you ever experienced an increased sexual desire around ovulation? Those are your estrogen levels peaking baby.
- Testosterone is typically considered a male hormone, but we, as women, produce these too! Testosterone plays a crucial role in female sexual health. It influences your sexual desire and arousal. Low levels of testosterone can lead to less sexual desire.
- Pregnancy and postpartum period: During pregnancy and after childbirth, hormonal changes can dramatically affect sex drive. Estrogen and progesterone levels fluctuate significantly during these times, which can lead to a decrease in libido.
- Menopause: Menopause is associated with a decrease in estrogen and testosterone, which can lead to vaginal dryness, discomfort during sex, and a reduced sex drive.
- Stress and Cortisol: Cortisol, the stress hormone, can negatively impact sexual desire. Chronic stress leads to elevated cortisol levels, which can suppress the body’s usual hormonal balance, leading to a decreased libido.
- Thyroid Hormones: Both hyperthyroidism (too much thyroid hormone) and hypothyroidism (too little thyroid hormone) can affect libido. The thyroid regulates metabolism, energy levels, and mood, which can impact sexual desire.
- Prolactin: Elevated levels of prolactin, a hormone released by the pituitary gland, can suppress estrogen and testosterone production, reducing libido. This is often seen in breastfeeding women.
Is it still a surprise that stress influences our sex drive?
- Acute Stress: Short-term or acute stress can sometimes cause a temporary spike in sexual desire. This is often due to the body's initial surge in stress (again!) hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, which increase arousal levels.
- Chronic Stress: Chronic stress, where stressors persist over a more extended period, is more likely to decrease sex drive. Ongoing stress can lead to elevated cortisol levels, which interfere with the hormones that drive sexual desire, such as testosterone. Chronic stress can also lead to fatigue, anxiety, and depression, all of which can further reduce libido.
Moderate and Manageable Stress: When reasonable and manageable, its impact on sex drive might be minimal. Some individuals find that successfully managing day-to-day stressors leads to an enhanced sense of accomplishment and well-being, positively influencing libido.
Or how an unhealthy lifestyle can reduce your lust for sexy time?
A variety of lifestyle factors can negatively impact sex drive. Here are some key elements that are known to reduce libido potentially:
- Poor Diet and Nutrition: If you weren't convinced about skipping that late-night Pizza order, here's the final argument for why you should. A diet lacking essential nutrients can lead to poor overall health, including reduced libido. Diets high in processed foods and low in fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins may adversely affect sexual health. Nutrient deficiencies, particularly in vitamins like B6 and E, essential fatty acids, and minerals like zinc and selenium, can impact hormone levels and sexual function.
- Lack of Physical Exercise: Regular physical activity is crucial for maintaining good circulation and hormone balance, which is essential for a healthy sex drive. Sedentary lifestyles can lead to poor cardiovascular health and reduced stamina, negatively affecting libido.
- Alcohol and Substance Abuse: Excessive alcohol consumption and the use of recreational drugs can dampen sexual desire and performance. While alcohol might lower inhibitions initially, it can impair sexual function and desire in the long run.
- Insufficient Sleep: Lack of adequate sleep can lead to fatigue and increased stress levels, which can significantly lower sex drive. Chronic sleep deprivation can also disrupt hormone production, including hormones responsible for libido.
- Chronic Stress and Overwork: High levels of stress and demanding work life can exhaust the body and mind, leaving little energy for sexual activity. Chronic stress can also lead to hormonal imbalances that reduce libido.
- Negative Mental Health: Mental health issues like depression and anxiety can significantly decrease sexual desire. These conditions can affect self-esteem, energy levels, and overall interest in sexual activity.
- Poor Body Image and Low Self-Esteem: How one perceives one's body can significantly affect one's libido. Poor body image and low self-esteem can lead to a lack of sexual confidence and a decrease in sexual desire.
- Smoking: Smoking can impair circulation, reducing blood flow to the genitals and leading to lower libido and potential difficulties in achieving arousal and orgasm.
- Lack of Intimacy or Connection: In the context of a relationship, a lack of emotional intimacy or unresolved relationship issues can reduce the desire for sexual activity.
- Excessive Screen Time: Spending excessive time on screens, especially before bedtime, can disrupt sleep patterns and reduce opportunities for intimate interaction, indirectly affecting libido.
- Medication Side Effects: Certain medications, including antidepressants, antihypertensives, and hormonal contraceptives, can lower libido as a side effect.
The holy trinity to Increasing your sex drive
Of course, we offer libido enhancers such as our sex bonbons and libido-increasing teas. But these won't come fully to fruition if you don't improve on the fundamentals of increasing your sex drive. If 2024 is going to be your year, commit to:
- Lifestyle Adjustments: Sign up for your first 5K, Join our run club, skip the fast foods and set a reminder every night to go to bed. Also, just like taking vitamins for optimal health, we recommend looking into what natural remedies help maintain a healthy sex life (Ginseng, Maca, Ginkgo Biloba, Epimedium, Ashwagandha and Tribulus Terrestris, to name a few). If you're really committed, you should also limit your alcohol consumption and quit smoking to enhance overall health and blood flow. But who are we? Your mom? Our advice: Start with small increments and incorporate small habits you deem realistic. Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither was a thriving sex drive.
- Stress and Mental Health Management: Implement stress-reducing practices like yoga, meditation, or a good old masturbation session. Address any underlying mental health issues with professional help, being ashamed of going to a therapist is soooo passé. Emotional well-being is crucial for a healthy sex drive.
- Relationship and Self-Exploration: Foster emotional intimacy with your partner through quality time and open communication. Explore your sexual desires and preferences through content, an air suction toy (we promise, it doesn't disappoint), and quality time. Consider discussing any potential medication side effects with your healthcare provider if they're impacting your libido.
Libido enhancing bonbons
If you've made it this far, you show commitment. As a team of four busy, stressed (but blessed) women, we've researched and tested different herbs and consulted our Chinese moms and aunties on age-old wisdom on naturally increasing libido in women. Epimedium (or also 'Horny Goat Weed' as a goat herder found out that his goat was extra sexually active after consuming this plant), Ashwagandha and Ginseng have all been blended into a tasty and bite-sized premium chocolate bonbon covered in passionfruit and dark chocolate. We've experienced nights ranging from 'giggly encounters' to 'complete sessions of relaxation' to 'mind-blowing, fully awakened sexual liberations'.
Our last three batches have sold out, and we can only produce our Sex Bonbons in limited quantities as they are hand-crafted with much love and care. Get our witchcraft called libido-increasing Sex Bonbons here before it's too late.